It’s okay not to have it all PerfecT!

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People are unhappy, no matter what you give them, they’ll be unhappy. Each one of us once – for sure – has faced a time where we wanted to have things done the perfect way but somehow couldn’t and we blamed either our own incapabilities or the someone else’s for that. I am one amongst them, in fact on the top list. I have had uncountable number of days that didn’t go according to my wish and I ended up with grudges and bad moments. It took me time to realize, that’s okay.

It is okay to have a bad day, it is okay not to have something you wanted, it is okay to have a task unfinished, a deadline missed and I don’t know what more..We live in a World which is and can never be perfect, no day, no weather, no job, no situation, nothing is perfect. We are the biggest example of imperfection. From our childhood, we learn to do things without making mistakes, getting the best out of the situation and growing as a perfect person. But it isn’t that simple (in fact impossible). We always do mistakes – sometimes repeat the same ones again and again, we leave situation in a bad state – sometimes without even realizing it, and we do not grow into a better person. Rather a lunatic, searching for something not existing.

Life is beautiful. Yes, it is and it is worth mentioning a trillion times and more. Be thankful you’re not the person in Gaza or in Syria who is scared to death of bomb attacks. Be thankful you’re not the person begging on streets in India, Pakistan or Bangladesh who cannot even afford to eat once a day. Be thankful you’re not the person in a hospital dying of a chronic disease leaving your family behind. Be thankful rather than being sad of not having something accomplished. It isn’t the end of the World.

Tomorrow is a new day, a new opportunity to get your things back in shape and get started, today is the day to relax, recall and being thankful for things you’ve enjoyed,

tomorrow is a new hope to get stuff under your control and get your strength to a next level, today is a day to rejuvenate from the battles you’ve won,

tomorrow is day to stand up and rise and conquer the World for your happiness and peace, today is the day to be thankful that you’re still alive and can still bring a smile on your face!

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..and the life got stable!

It wasn’t long ago, when I had just finished my secondary school and was thinking deeply about choosing the major to continue my senior secondary education. It was complicated for me because this would decide my future. Well, hell yeah…The Future. A very lame joke I’ve been listening to while growing up was – ‘after this decision of your life, your life’s gonna better and stable’. Well, another hell yeah…Stable Life. Once, the school was done, I had to take engineering entrance exam and then of course the 4 yrs of Bachelors, followed with a couple of company entrance exams and interviews. And trust me, none of that looked ”Stable” or ”better”. Each time, I was struggling to get into a position where I had to struggle even harder. The interesting part is that until now, I’d not found the stability I was being told I’d found soon. Later I did my masters, got graduated, and today I am here, writing this blog hoping it’d make – at least – a bit of sense for the readers.

The interesting thing that I experienced in the last couple of years of life was the – stability. It isn’t unusual when people tend to love to be stable in almost every aspect of their lives. A stable field of study, job, marriage, kids and their lives and until the day they die. And, indeed, it is the stability that makes us feel not insecure about the random things happening around us. But, just because we close our eyes doesn’t make the surroundings dark. Things cannot be certain, they’re not meant to be. No matter how often we try to take control over stuff, we can never control them. And this is where, the lame joke turns into a delightful lesson.

It is not the life that becomes better but it is us who become stronger, more immune to fight the odds and win the even.Β It is not the life that become stable but us, who decide what to think over and what to avoid without worrying and moving on. The education we do, probably doesn’t help us in our job profiles or work but its learning does.Β  Life was, it is and it will be unstable, there will be unexpected ups and downs, number of good and bad moments to tear us apart, moments where we will question ourself and our judgment and decisions but, this is how it is supposed to be lived. But, this is what life is all about. It couldn’t have been better.

A better and stable life is not the life but it is you who is leading the life. Have you ever heard that a ship that made its own way to the shore, probably not. Because it isn’t the boat that is good it is the helmsman who brings the ship in a stable condition to hold and make it to the shore. And, here it is you to get your life-ship on a stable position to have a great and better journey ahead!

 

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A puzzle..I had !

Beauty is subjective and the subjectivity goes to the extent of the subject’s thoughts, past, lifestyle and mind set. So, sometime if you get to encounter someone telling you about your beauty, think twice – no matter what you listen. If you hear a negative comment don’t have hatred and sorrow in your heart but move on but if you hear a positive statement then don’t be proud as …beauty is still subjective.

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The essential 5H’s for Humans..

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It is indeed a matter of fact that humans are species with special strength and capabilities to find out problems, deal with them either finding solutions or creating new problems πŸ˜‰ in return. Each one of us is living in his/her own problem box, some of which are created abruptly, some lingering on since a long time and some are just mental illusions (because human mind is pretty capable enough to create super fantastic unreal issues). What, in my opinion, common in all of us is the exhaustion caused by these so-called problems. No matter how big or small, new or old, easy or tough these problems are they create some sort of fatigue and panic that sucks out the happiness, peace, patience and most importantly our life from us. And this is where, we seek someone deliberately who can hold or hand and walk us out of the very gloomy dark cloud around us so that we can breathe the freshness of problem-free life.

A very small yet heart-touching incident happened to me this morning. A dear friend of mine was unable to start his car as the battery drained out overnight. The problem wasn’t the car mainly, but his family he had to drive to airport to catch a flight a couple of hours from that moment. He did not expect this and so each one of them were in the same gloomy dark problem panic attack – How to get this damn car started! After spending almost 20-25 minutes a person came for help, my friend got the battery charged and the car was all set to go. Each one of us thanked the guy who helped with his car’s battery and after thanking him each one of us went back to our homes. But this did not end here, in fact I would say, this is where things got started.

It is easy to let things go but when things like these happen, you must not let them go. In this whole 45 minute problem generation scenario, I could see clearly the ability of a human who could so easily cure a problem of another human. This is where I believe the core of Humanity lies. Basically, in my personal opinion, there are 5H’s that each human must possess: Help, Humble, Honor, Hope and Humanity.

Helping attitude is one of the first qualities we must nurture in ourself. To be able to think that we can be some help, is to be able to see through the problems of other people. It is not uncommon to have a helping perspective. We inherently learn to offer a helping hand to our family members, relatives and gradually to the friends we make. We know, we can be of some help to people we know.We know our loved ones will at some point in their lives need our help and so we are there for the same, always.

Humble heart and a helping attitude is a great combi pack in its own. We can have a helping attitude but with an impolite behaviour – and that makes absolute nonsense! We need to be kind and polite in order to lend a helping hand to someone in need. Most importantly, we need to stop our ‘expecting something in return’ behaviour to be on the tip of the iceberg.

Honoring the person with a humble heart and a helping attitude is much more than the above. People who help and are nice but later praise themselves and their act of kindness to others to gain appraisal don’t make any good, neither to themselves nor to the society. Such a behaviour is harming our own integrity and questioning the very own act of kindness performed a while ago. As charity begins from home so does honoring.

Hope is one big thing to talk about. Hope is what make most of us sleep every night and get up next morning to do our best. Hope is what keep us happy even if we are going through the worst days of our lives because we hope the worst to pass and the best to come over again. Creating this sense of hope in someone’s life or even a single day is an achievement to relish, a contentment in its own.

Having created hope extending a helping hand with a humble heart and honoring the dignity of self and the person is what HUMANITY is all about. None of us, trust me with this, lacks any of these H’s in us. We just need to sit down, look deep down inside our own selves, within our heart and soul, and we will find them there. As it is indeed a matter of fact that humans are species with special strength and capabilities to find out problems, deal with deal with them finding the best solutions and a Happy World in return.

Remember, you need not to be special but strong enough to make someone feel special.

 

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She was nothing but a spare..

In the midst of cold weather and frozen hearts, she was sitting on a couch of devastating experiences with a heart torn apart,

Loud laughs, hugs and blabbering was almost over filling the air, she was not one amongst them but just a spare,

The momentum of the wind around was something that no one could manage to abate, but the warm slow tears running down her cheeks were more unfortunate,

They came and paid her immensely for the pretty flowers, and then they all ran to click the best piece of picture under the beautiful Eiffel tower,

It was colourful milieu and fragrance of Lilies, Roses and Hyacinths was filling the air, she made this happen but sadly no one was there for her to care,

Their were kids playing outside in the fountain of water, she wanted to join to rejoice and smile but stopped herself and let her thoughts of being happy shatter,

She was one of them, once, long back, very long back, she sighed and wished she could walk back home walking the same track,

She closed her eyes and wanted to rejoice her childhood – at least – as a dream, she was almost there with a small curve on her lip but suddenly opened her eyes with heavy breathing and a scream,

Water calmed her down and deep breathes brought her heart back to regular beats, she slowly went back to the door and took a seat,

Smile was what she couldn’t reach in her dream as she was scared terribly, she wished she could share it with someone all this experience verbally,

Each day was the same story and each night the same deadly disturbing dream, all she everyday was in search of a gleam,

Days passed and so did years, she forgot about happiness and love, and finally became friends with her tears,

She sold flowers covered in happy and fresh robes, she earned money but had lost the gleam of hope,

Accepting her fate she did the same, never uttered a word but kept smiling and no one ever knew her name,

In the midst of cold weather and frozen hearts, she remained seated on the couch of devastating experiences with a heart torn apart,

Loud laughs, hugs and blabbering was almost over filling the air, she was never amongst them but always just a spare…

 

 

..because I have realized, I have started!

Life is about learning and earning the best of everything. The best of values, culture, religion, belief and many alike. My mind somehow always ignored the notion of growing old with increasing age and slowly – with time – this notion seems to get more bold and strong. Ageing, for me, is just a procedure and age is a parameter of the same, your cells in the body can go weak, your power might mitigate, your skin may loose and none of these biological processes are under your control (although medical researches are trying to control this and have been successful but not completely). On the other hand of the biological process, if you desire your vision of looking at this world can increase to a million times, the ability to listen and think before you act can improvise and the ultimate being – in our case the Human – shall stay alive in the memories and as an improvised human being in the history of mankind. I am of very strong opinion that we – only with the power of realization and comprehension – can take hold of the time and our lives and try not get old, die and lost in history forever. I believe, we have the potential to grow young with time by growing in our thoughts. With this realization that I’ve came across in my life I…

  1. I have stopped judging people as I realized, ‘the judgements most of the people around me had were simply my circumstantially affected behaviours’,
  2. I have stopped lying because I realized, ‘a lie is a pleasant and comforting form of breaking trust and faith that could’ve been saved otherwise’,
  3. I have started greeting people when ‘someone’s smile made my weak and stressful day’,
  4. I have started complementing people about their beauty since, ‘it is not the beauty that appears on the face it is something people carry within their souls’,
  5. I have learned to stay quiet in conversations because, ‘sometimes it is the listening ear and calm body language that makes people relieve their stress and smile again’,
  6. I have started forgiving people ‘when I realized I beg and expect for the same forgiveness from others when I am wrong’,
  7. I have started appreciating the love and concern of my family and friends since I realized ‘the best of what they can give to me is the time they have me in their thoughts’,
  8. I have started donating my time to the needy because I realized ‘sometimes it is not the quantity of your donation but the quality of time you spent with them’,
  9. I have started valuing small moments of happiness with my loved ones since I realized ‘it is the life I live in these moments and not only the moments in my life that matters’,
  10. I have started to watch my thoughts and desires because I realized ‘thoughts shape your mind and mind affects your entire lifestyle’…

 

So, as life is about learning and earning the best of everything why not start with your own self and stay young at mind and heart forever!!

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